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Hearing someone talk about suicidal thoughts can feel frightening. We might worry about saying the wrong thing, making the situation worse, or not knowing how to help.
However, suicidal thoughts are more common than many people realise. By understanding what suicidal ideation is, recognising common misconceptions, and knowing how to respond, we can help create a culture where people feel able to reach out for support.
What is suicidal ideation?
Suicidal ideation, also known as suicidal thoughts, refers to thoughts about ending your own life. These thoughts can vary greatly from person to person and may range from fleeting thoughts or not wanting to be alive to more detailed plans around suicide.
Sometimes the terms passive and active suicidal thoughts are used:
- Passive suicidal thoughts may involve somebody no longer having the motivation to live but not actively having a plan or intention to act on those thoughts.
- Active suicidal thoughts may involve thinking about suicide more directly and considering acting on those thoughts.
Experiencing suicidal thoughts does not automatically mean that someone wants to end their life. Instead, it can reflect a desire to escape overwhelming emotions or difficult circumstances.
Who can experience suicidal thoughts?
A common misconception is that only people with a diagnosed mental health condition experience suicidal thoughts. In reality, anyone can experience suicidal ideation for a variety of reasons.
Research suggests that as many as 1 in 4 people experience suicidal thoughts at some point in their lives, highlighting just how common these experiences can be.
Every person's experience is unique. Some people may be unsure why they're experiencing these thoughts or how to express them.
Signs someone may be experiencing suicidal thoughts
There is no single sign that somebody is experiencing suicidal thoughts, and everyone's experience is different. However, some people may:
- Withdraw from friends, family or usual activities
- Talk about feeling hopeless, trapped or like a burden to others
- Experience significant changes in mood or behaviour
- Have changes in sleep patterns or appetite
- Increase their use of alcohol or drugs
- Seem unusually quiet, overwhelmed, or disconnected
These signs do not always mean somebody is experiencing suicidal thoughts, but they may indicate that someone is struggling and could benefit from support and a compassionate conversation.
Why talking about suicide matters
Despite increased awareness, there is still stigma attached to suicide, which can make it difficult for people to speak openly about how they're feeling due to fear of judgment, embarrassment, worrying others, or being misunderstood.
In 2025, according to ONS figures, 5,728 deaths by suicide were registered in England, with rates remaining similar to 2024 and 2023, making suicide a significant public health concern.
People who experience suicidal thoughts may struggle to seek support for a variety of reasons, including:
Not wanting to burden others
People experiencing suicidal thoughts often feel as though they would be causing problems for others if they seek support, or that their loved ones would be better off without them. These feelings can make it difficult to reach out, even when support is needed most.
Worrying they won’t be taken seriously
Some people minimise their own struggles or fear that others will dismiss what they're experiencing. They may worry that people will see them as attention-seeking, dramatic, or overreacting.
Feeling ashamed or embarrassed
Stigma surrounding suicide, and mental health concerns, can lead people to feel guilty or ashamed about struggling. This can prevent open conversations and make people feel isolated.
Finding it difficult to put their feelings into words
Some individuals know they are struggling but cannot fully explain what they're experiencing or why. They may worry about saying the wrong thing or being misunderstood.
Believing that things won’t get better
When someone is experiencing intense or overwhelming emotions, it can be difficult to believe that circumstances can change. Feelings of hopelessness can make seeking help feel pointless, even though effective support is available.
These common feelings are why having open, compassionate conversations about suicide matters. Creating space for people to talk without fear of judgement can help to reduce the stigma surrounding suicide, increase understanding and encourage people to access support sooner.
How to support someone experiencing suicidal thoughts
You don't need to have all the answers or be a mental health professional to support someone who is struggling. If somebody opens up to you about struggling with their mental health:
Listen without judgement
Try to allow them to speak openly about what they're experiencing and listen carefully. Avoid:
- Minimising their feelings
- Trying to offer quick fixes
- Comparing their situation to somebody else’s
- Jumping to conclusions and panicking
Ask direct but compassionate questions
Many people worry that asking about suicide will put the idea into someone's head, but that's not the case. If you're concerned, it's okay to directly ask:
"Are you having thoughts about harming yourself?"
"Have you been thinking about suicide?"
"Are you feeling like you don't want to be here anymore?"
Asking these questions can help somebody to feel seen and give them permission to talk honestly about what they're going through.
Reassure them that support is available
Let them know that they do not have to cope alone and encourage them to access appropriate support, whether that's:
- Their GP
- Mental health services
- Support through work
- Specialist helplines
- Trusted family or friends
You don't need to have all the answers, but offering to explore support options with them can go a long way in helping them to feel less alone.
Take immediate risk seriously
If someone has told you that they intend to act on suicidal thoughts or may be at immediate risk, seek support straight away and stay with them where possible.
- Call NHS 111: Dial 111 and select the mental health option for urgent, 24/7 advice. If they are in immediate danger, call 999.
Starting a difficult conversation
Many people want to help when they're worried about someone but don't know how to begin the conversation.
You don't need to have the perfect words and listening is far more important than knowing exactly what to say. You could start a conversation by saying:
"I've noticed you've not seemed yourself lately, how are things?"
"You seem like you're carrying a lot right now. Do you want to talk about it?"
"I'm here to listen if you need someone."
"You don't have to go through this on your own."
If the response you're hoping for doesn't come straight away, the person may not feel ready to talk or they may choose to seek support elsewhere. Try not to feel discouraged or take it personally. What matters is that you've shown you care and created an opportunity for conversation. It may not be the right time, but you've opened the door and reminded them that they don't have to face things alone.
If you're struggling with your mental health or experiencing suicidal thoughts
If you're struggling with your mental health or are experiencing suicidal thoughts, you are not alone.
When you're struggling, it can be easy to believe that nobody will understand or that things will never improve. These thoughts can make reaching out feel difficult. However, talking to someone you trust, whether that's a friend, family member, colleague, mental health professional, GP, or support service, can be an important first step.
Get support with Turning Point
You don't need to wait until you're in crisis to ask for help. Support is available.
If you feel unable to keep yourself safe, or are worried you might act on suicidal thoughts, seek urgent help by calling 111, 999 or a helpline such as the Samaritans on 116 123.
At Turning Point, we provide a range of services including talking therapies, residential rehabilitation, supported accommodation, crisis services, workplace support, and carers support. Use our local services finder to see how you can be supported in your local community.