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From Chaos to a Turning Point
Before recovery, my life was chaotic, overwhelming, and often completely out of control. What started as substance use when I was young gradually became daily use of multiple substances. It affected the way I thought, behaved, and coped with life.
I regularly found myself in unsafe situations and unhealthy relationships, including experiences of domestic violence that had a huge impact on my confidence, emotional wellbeing, and sense of safety. My mental health continued to deteriorate as anxiety, panic attacks, and unresolved trauma became overwhelming. Using substances felt like the only way I could cope or escape.
Looking back, I can honestly say my behaviour and communication were terrible. I withdrew from people around me and stopped recognising the person I had become.
My relationships suffered, especially with my family. Communication with my mum broke down completely and, most painfully of all, my son Camden was removed from my care because of safeguarding concerns.
I wasn't living - I was surviving.
Eventually, the combined impact of my substance use, declining mental health, damaged relationships, and the possibility of losing my son permanently forced me to take a hard look at my life. I realised something had to change, and that change had to start with me.
Looking Ahead: Recovery with Purpose
Today, my recovery is guided by purpose, stability, and hope. My goals are to maintain my recovery, continue improving my mental health, provide a stable home for my son, and keep prioritising my wellbeing.
Most importantly, I want to give back by supporting others and showing that recovery is possible. I know first-hand how hopeless things can feel, but I also know that with the right support and mindset, change really is achievable.
Taking the First Steps Towards Recovery
Recovery has been one of the hardest things I have ever done. I had to face years of emotions, trauma, and uncertainty that I had spent a long time avoiding, while learning how to cope without substances.
The early days were incredibly difficult. My anxiety was intense, and simply getting through a day without using substances often felt like a huge achievement. Although I experienced a lapse during my recovery journey, I chose to learn from it rather than let it define me or derail my progress.
Through recovery, I started to understand my triggers better. I recognised how emotional overwhelm, stress, impulsivity, and using substances as a reward or escape had influenced my choices. For the first time, I felt like I was gaining insight and control over my life.
One of the biggest reasons I have come this far is my mindset. I accepted responsibility for making changes, stayed open to support, attended appointments, engaged fully with recovery programmes, and kept showing up even when things felt tough.
The support I received from Steve and the Somerset Drug and Alcohol Service (SDAS) was life-saving. They gave me structure, accountability, encouragement, and belief when I needed it most. With determination and the right support, I slowly began rebuilding my life one step at a time.
Rebuilding Family, Health and Confidence
Today, my life is unrecognisable from where it once was. I have achieved sustained abstinence from Class A substances and remain actively engaged in my recovery.
Restoring Family Relationships
One of my greatest achievements has been rebuilding my family life. I have restored my relationship with my mum, and my son Camden has returned to live with me. Through honesty, personal growth, and improved communication, I have become a more present, consistent, and confident parent.
Healing Mental Health and Trauma
I am actively working with mental health services to address trauma that I avoided for many years. By facing those experiences head-on, I continue to build resilience, self-awareness, and emotional strength.
Using Fitness as a Tool for Recovery
Physical health has become a major part of my recovery. I regularly go to the gym, work with a personal trainer, run, walk every day, and enjoy activities like yoga and Parkrun. Exercise has given me confidence, routine, emotional stability, and a sense of achievement that I never thought possible.
Recognition Through Recovery
My progress was recognised with an Inspired by Possibility Award, which meant a great deal to me and reflected the hard work I had put into changing my life. I am now working towards becoming a Recovery Champion and exploring opportunities to become a peer mentor so I can support others on their recovery journeys.
My Message to Others
"There were times I didn't think I'd ever get here. I lost everything at one point - my confidence, my family, myself. But slowly, step by step, things started to change. Now I've got my son back, I'm rebuilding my relationship with my mum, and I'm finally working on myself properly. If you're feeling stuck or overwhelmed, don't give up. Things really can change, because I'm living proof that they do."